Last week I talked a little bit about power and how we give it away, but the question remains as to what can we do to keep power? How do we feel empowered and stand in our strength?

I’m a fan of simplicity and a few actions that cover many bases, which is why I put together a small list of how we can take power back and own that beautiful force within.

Cheryl Costello Pink Play Mags

Five Ways to Take Your Power Back

1.) Spend time alone; Schedule downtime.
The times I’ve had the greatest understandings of myself have come when I escape from the noise the world around me is making, and descend into a quiet space within. Only then can I truly appreciate what I want, need and look forward to, so that I can create my life from a place of intention that empowers me. It’s where my strongest and most powerful sense of self comes from. I call it my time to talk to the trees, or conversing with my beloved bodies of water.

2.) Remember that your significance here is not determined by the hours you spent making things for other people.
You are a powerful being. It’s true because of who you are, not the things listed on your resume, what you’ve contributed to the community, or your job title. You’re important here because of how you’ve been through those things and who you’ve become. Staying in a place of power comes from remembering that it’s not the things you do that make your contribution significant, but the way you grace this Earth with two steady footfalls greeting the light of day in the morning. It’s okay to stop creating for a while and steep yourself in the place of power you created from. Nothing changes *that* place and that’s where your spark lives too.

3.) Ask yourself, “Why is this here?” of your friends, quality of family relationships, and especially when you look at your agenda every day.
It wasn’t until I took a step back and took radical ownership of everything happening in my life that I was able to declare my worth and live from a place of authentic, unfettered self-love. We wouldn’t throw our children or nieces and nephews into a room full of strangers and demand that they act as though they know them, yet we do this with our relationships and daily “to-do” lists. We spend more time trying to figure out how to navigate the meanings behind events while feeling frustrated at the quality of friendships we’ve forged, because we fail to ask these questions of ourselves. The moment we take a weekend and are brave enough to examine it all closely, is the moment we allow ourselves to feel the full spread of our wings as the wind carries us forward with the utmost intention.

4.) Make your physical health a priority.
Plainly stated, it’s hard, if not impossible, to live at your most empowered when you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop with your health, or if you’re plagued with some ailment you won’t go to the doctor for. I do understand that comprehensive health care is often for the privileged among us, though even when I was living below the poverty line I still made this a priority and found ways to fill in the gaps between to keep myself healthy enough to survive that hardship.

5.) Be willing to take ownership of your mistakes and be willing to learn from them.
The moment we excuse ourselves as people who aren’t capable of making mistakes, we hand over our power to the things and people we made mistakes about. It is possible to see mistakes, name them as such, and still feel powerful.

The thing about power is that it’s not something others give us. We may be given trust, authority or respect, but true power comes from within and it starts with understanding how powerful we are to begin with.

Know too, that only when you stand and speak from your place of power, through fear and everything else that might hold you back, will you encounter the fiercest of enemies, because no one likes it when the one they measured their success against is no longer there to compare themselves to.

Only those who wanted power over you, will see your empowerment as a threat.

Only those who liked for you to believe their lies, will feel threatened by your truth.

Only when you commit to spread your wings can the Universe match your speed with a breeze that lifts you up so high that you can see for miles, all the places you stopped to learn to fly.

Only then can you free yourself from the need to experience anything less than an incredible life.

Be brave and own the fire within you, because it has a way of lighting up the world.

Cheryl Costello Pink Play Mags

Love, Light and Miracles,


About the Author

Cheryl Costello is the founder of The Finding Hearts Project, also writes for the Brampton Focus and formerly wrote at The Loving Instant. She has also worked with Fortune 500 and Financial Post 500 companies to bring greater attention, awareness and action for LGBTQ+ issues, giving the community a powerful voice. She has conducted workshops for LGBTQ+ students on the power of reclaiming their power through owning the stories they tell and was also a Keynote speaker at a Toronto World Pride event in 2014. If she isn't writing or organizing in the community, she's out with her camera, wandering a bookstore or out hiking among trees and water. Have a question you want to see answered on the blog? Stop by her page on Instagram, join in the good vibes and send her a message: @cherylalisoncostello