I’m an aromatic sex-averse asexual, and proud of it
Asexuality (ace) is another identity that’s often misunderstood. It’s basically someone with little to no interest in sexual activity (orientation), which is different from abstinence or celibacy (behavioural). The term can encompass a broad definition, which may or may not include romantic non-sexual partnerships, solo masturbation, or having sex for the sole purpose of satisfying their partner. As well, asexual individuals may often still identify with one of the several other identities within the LGBTQ+ or heterosexual communities. Read below for one individual’s personal experience coming out as asexual.
My name is Amy Lynn Vaughan-Dolson. I am 37 years old female who identifies as a aromantic (someone who experiences little to no romantic attraction to others) sex-averse asexual (someone who doesn’t want sex and I don’t experience any sexual attraction to anyone).
It took me a long time to figure out how I feel. I didn’t know that you could be asexual. It makes sense now because I didn’t understand what others were talking about when it came to sexual attraction, the feelings others would talk about because I don’t experience it.
It can feel lonely that nobody around you gets how you feel. It took me a little longer to figure out that I’m aromantic, because I feel things emotionally so deeply. In the future if I find someone who sees things and feels things the way I do, maybe we could be in a QPR. I am a very emotional, affectionate, and loyal person who wants to be there for someone. If it doesn’t happen I’m happy and proud of who i am.
Ace Toronto is a diverse group of people (in the Toronto region and surrounding area) who are on the ace/asexual spectrum and/or the aromantic spectrum (and those questioning whether they might be ace and/or arospec).
People on the asexual spectrum (i.e., “ace people”) include, for example, people who identify as asexual, greyasexual and/or demisexual (of various romantic orientations and/or who are aromantic). There are many, diverse ace identities and experiences.
People on the aromantic spectrum (i.e., “arospec people”) include, for example, people who self-identify as aromantic, greyromantic and/or demiromantic (who might or might not also be ace). There are many, diverse arospec identities and experiences.
Ace Toronto is about building local asexual/ace and/or arospec (and questioning) community connections by:
facilitating educational workshops
About the Author
Bryen Dunn is a freelance journalist based in Toronto with a focus on tourism, lifestyle, entertainment and community issues. He has written several travel articles and has an extensive portfolio of celebrity interviews with musicians, actors and other public personalities. He’s willing to take on any assignments of interest, attend parties with free booze, listen to rants, and travel the world in search of the great unknown. He’s eager to discover the new, remember the past, and look into the future.