So, you think you have a strong relationship with your partner? Well, try building a house together! This is not a joking matter, but building a home really is a complicated process that takes a lot of effort, research, money, and hard decisions, so it will definitely test your relationship. 

It’s crucial to be on the same page and even the same paragraph with your partner during the house-building process, otherwise this ordeal will become even harder. Luckily, you can use this guide to rely on when things get hard. Here are a few basic things to know when you’re building a house with your LGBTQ partner: 

Start from your location

No matter if you’re building your house from the foundation up or if you’re doing a complete rebuild, the location is the key, especially for LGBTQ couples. We might not enjoy the same safety in every country, state, city or even neighborhood, so it’s important to choose the right location for your construction. Luckily, there are apps like Trulia and OK Cupid that have “Pride Scores” for different neighborhoods so you can know where you’re welcome the most. 

Think about financing

This is a hard one, especially today when land, building materials and contractors are so expensive. You’re going to need a lot of dough for your new home, and believe it or not, not every bank is ready to loan to gay couples. Inequality when it comes to LGBTQ home ownership is still very noticeable, especially in countries and states that do not recognize gay marriage. It’s best to get a lawyer and go over your rights before visiting a loan provider. Later, you can discuss joint property ownership. 

Hire the right people

In theory, it’s possible for the two of you to build a house on your own, but it would take you years of hard work, money and research. A much faster and safer path is to hire the right experts for the job, especially when it comes to some complicated tasks like setting up plumbing and electrical. Your expert will work quickly and effectively and save you time, money and effort. Most true top-rated contractors are also very open- minded, professional and friendly to all clients so that you won’t have any issues regarding your lifestyle.

Interior designers or DIY?

After your contractors are finished and gone, you’ll be left with this empty space that needs to be turned into a home. You have two options—try decorating yourself or hire a professional. If you’re attracted to a very modern and functional space, then hiring pros might be the best thing to do (even though it can cost you more money). But those couples dreaming of a traditional house or something completely crazy and quirky will benefit better from a DIY route. Just because you’re gay, it doesn’t mean you can automatically design an amazing interior for your new home, so don’t feel pressured to do everything yourself. 

Stay on the budget

It’s so easy to get carried away while planning, designing, building and especially decorating your home. Unless you have an unlimited budget, it’s wise to come up with a good plan that will keep you going over the budget. Put structural works at the top of your list, going from more significant to less important elements. No matter how it might seem to you while you’re in your designer mindset, it’s always better to have a comfortable bedroom and a functional kitchen than a huge party pool or a designated gaming room. Also, it’s essential to pay for legal fees and estate planning changes. 

Work on your flexibility

Do you have an exact vision of your forever home? Often, what you have in mind is simply impossible to pull off in reality. Also, during the construction and interior design process, you’ll come across many limits and obstacles, but don’t let them discourage you. Be flexible and armed with plenty of backup plans. 

It’s more than possible for LGBTQ couples today to live together happily ever after in their own little castle. With these tips above, you’ll get to design your castle together and truly live the gay fairy tale life. 

About the Author

Peter Minkoff is a lifestyle editor at Queer Voices ( Originally from Australia, he's currently living in Europe. A fashion styling graduate, he's a true craft beer and soy latte aficionado, loves spending his days at the beach, and visiting second-hand stores on a daily basis. Follow Peter on Twitter (