Going Back in the Closet? Has he lost it? Nope. It’s the name of my new fashion column here in PinkPlayMags.

For those of us in the 2SLGBTQIA+ community, we have spent a lot of time coming out of the closet. A space that can represent shame, confusion, and unnerving feelings about what to do next. So I applaud you for coming out of the closet… but today, we’re going back in!

Research shows that first impressions are made within 7 seconds. What are the most controllable and changeable aspects of that first impression? Clothes! The items that most of (the time) we choose to cover our bodies with. These few seconds are just enough for someone to do a quick eye scan up and down and make their judgement. 

Imagine that the next time you step out of the house you meet the love of your life (if so, jealous), your next employer or business partner, or an unpredictable friendship sparks in line at the grocery store. Because, diva, the second we leave the house we are a walking billboard.

So how do you like to present yourself? Sophisticated and chic, trendy and edgy, natural and effortless? Your clothes tell your whole story, whether you intend they do or not. Are you stuck in the same style from a different decade, or dare I say millennium? You’re not alone — I’ve been there too.

Seriously, check out THIS look from my baby gay days:

I single-handedly kept the Guess store in business while in high school and university. While that look was wild and “so me” at that moment, my style and self have evolved much since then. But trust me, style doesn’t have to be complicated. With some guidance and even a shred of a love for fashion, you can rock any outfit and feel fabulous.

Those of us in the 2SLGBTQIA+ community are survivors. No matter how simple or difficult coming out was, you survived! Even after coming out, we know how to hide our demons really well. Like, so well that they’re tucked so far back in our closets. We think we are hiding them well, but they show up in how we dress, and how we express ourselves to the world. Our worn-out sneakers, jeans that don’t fit just right anymore, or all-black outfits can all be mechanisms of hiding.

So the next time you blame your clothes for not being as glamorous as you’d like… what are you even saying to yourself in the mirror? How kind are the words you utter to yourself under your breath? Fashion is more than just a superficial interest — it’s a way to transform how we feel on the inside. Trust me, I went from shy and insecure, to confidently rocking stages partly because I owned my look!

Here’s the thing: your mindset is like the foundation of a stylish outfit. When it’s strong and aligned with who you truly are, your confidence becomes unstoppable. Your relationships flourish, your career path becomes clearer, and you embrace life with an authentic sense of purpose.

Don’t overthink it. Get rid of anything that you haven’t worn in 6 months, or anything you haven’t worn during its appropriate season. I’m serious. Thinning out your selection will make it easier to make a decision. Have a hot date? Great, rummage through 10 dresses instead of 30, 6 pairs of perfectly fitting jeans instead of 20 that are mostly worn out. 

Decluttering your space will do wonders for your mind. 

So, what do you say? Are you ready to unleash your inner fashionista? Let’s walk back in, let’s reclaim the closet. 

Join me in my new monthly column, Back In The Closet — stay tuned as I bring you some fall weather fashion tips next month!

Anthony Tomizza
Image Consultant
anthonytomizza.com

About the Author

Offering personalized guidance to clients to feel better in their identities and image, Anthony Tomizza serves as an authenticity coach, image consultant and speaker. As a proud member of the LGBTQ+ community, Anthony embarked on a transformative journey of self-discovery after coming out, enabling him to embrace and express his truest self. Anthony also takes the stage as a motivational speaker, inspiring individuals to embrace their unique identities and empowering them to cultivate an unparalleled sense of authenticity, both inside and out. www.anthonytomizza.com